Welcome to the Lake Tahoe Spiritual Living Center!

First of all, before I launch into my story I have to give credit where credit is due:  I will be patterning this particular post after a style invented by fellow blogger, student and friend, Z, who writes a blog called Life in ZD.  I love the humor in her blogs, and I don’t think I’ll ever be as funny as her, but this hair dryer thing shouted out to do a Life in ZD imitation!

Here is the hair dryer story:

About a year and a half ago I needed to get a new hair dryer.  I was so excited to find a very pretty pink flowered hair dryer that I never even considered investigating what was under the hood.  I just got the dryer because it was pretty.  It was so pretty in fact, that I took a photo of it and posted it on Facebook, telling everyone how excited I was to have an extraordinarily beautiful pretty pink hair dryer.

Here is the hair dryer:

So my hair dryer and I embarked on our new partnership and I quickly discovered this hair dryer did not perform to expectations.  It was either too hot (it actually burned my hair a couple of times) or not hot enough, and it didn’t have enough wind power to dry my hair in a decent period of time.

So, for about a year and a half, I have lived with substandard hair drying.  I really haven’t been happy with my hair for a whole year and a half  (oh, and Annette, if you are reading this, it was totally the hair dryer, not you!).  But I stuck with this hair dryer because it proved my uniqueness don’t you see, and besides, I had other more important things to worry about.

Given that the hair dryer never really worked right, you might be surprised to learn that I grieved when it died last week.  See, I was proud to have a hair dryer no one else had, even if it didn’t work right.  Every morning I would turn that puppy on and marvel that I  had found yet another product that wasn’t your yukky basic black.  I reveled in my uniqueness, even if said uniqueness meant I subjected myself to a series of bad hair days.  I was unique and that was all that mattered!  So when the hair dryer died, it’s as if a part of my uniqueness died with it.  I grieved.

Then I bought a new hair dryer.  This one is white.   It does have a pink stripe, but that isn’t what makes it special.  What makes it special is it works.  It works miraculously, wonderously!  It doesn’t burn my hair, it has more settings than the other one did, and it dries my hair quickly.  And I haven’t had a bad hair day since I got it.  It’s perfect!  And my hair is perfect too!

Now, you may be thinking that this blog is about how far I (and maybe some of you) will go to prove that I am so much more unique than others, but no, that’s not what this blog is about.  This blog is about allowing the wonderful to come into our life.  See, I could have taken my pretty pink hair dryer to my local appliance repair man for repair.  And I would have gone on having a series of bad hair days while furnishing my rut as the unique and one and only owner of the world’s only pink hair dryer.  But I decided to dive into the unknown and buy a new hair dryer.  The unknown can be a scary place to be, and the tendency to stay in the known even if it is less than perfect, even if it is really bad, is strong, simply to avoid that fearful unknown place.  But I’ve learned that the unknown usually isn’t near as scary as I’ve made it out to be, and I also have a very strong spiritual practice which makes it almost fun to go into the unknown.  And with that dive into the unknown, I allowed something new and wonderful to come into my life!

So if you are contemplating whether to stay in the known just because it is comfortable, or because there is some other payoff, consider that jumping into the unknown may open  you up to new and wonderful things you never even dreamed of!

You may be one of those people who is thinking, “there has to be something more than this!”  Or perhaps you are in a place of despair, wondering if and how it could be possible to move on, to actually find happiness.

Well, I’m here to tell you there yes, there is.  There is a way to find happiness, there is a way to find peace.  Actually, to put it more accurately, there is a way to BE happiness and peace, no matter what.  There is a way to know and feel that nothing is missing from your life.

It’s an inner journey, and one that can be traveled through tools provided by any Center for Spiritual Living.  I just happen to be writing more specifically about the Center for Spiritual Living Lake Tahoe, since that is home base for me, although you can find a Center just about anywhere in the country.

At the end of this post, you will find a list of events that we are offering at CSLLT, I hope you will join us!

Ok, 5 steps to improve  your life:

1.  Intention.  Set an intention.  If it is improvement you want, or simple a different way to be and live than the way you are living now, set that intention.

2.  Find some spiritual practices that will help you to achieve your intention.  This is where the Centers for Spiritual Living come in, that’s what we are all about.  Spiritual practices are about inner exploration that can be scientific as well as spiritual in nature.  What we do does not conflict with religion, in fact it adds to it if you are a member of a religious organization.

3.  Once you find those spiritual practices that fit well with you and your life style, stick to them.  It has been scientifically proven that consistent and persistent spiritual practice changes the neural pathways in the brain, which will allow you to feel and be differently.

4.  Don’t try to do this alone.  Find a class, a mentor, a guide to help you navigate that important inner journey.   Athletes use coaches, so do CEOs and Presidents.  Gurus had their own gurus and still keep advisors around.   I do not know of a single tradition or activity that does not advocate the use of a coach, mentor, guide or classes to help us learn.  Use what is available to you, you are worth it.

5.  Be open.  This inner journey will likely require you to consider things you never considered before.  Be open to those new ways of being and acting.

To help you on this inner journey, CSLLT is offering three events for you:

1.  Third Tuesdays:  every third Tuesday of the month (the next one is November 20, we offer a midweek evening Celebration.  It includes music, an inspirational talk, and fellowship!  Join us at 6 pm at the Blue Angel Loft on Ski Run Blvd in South Lake Tahoe.

2.  On all the other Tuesdays of the month until November 20th, we are offering a Beginner’s class.  This is your opportunity to discover if any of the tools for inner exploration that we offer are for you.  6 pm, at the Center in South Lake Tahoe.  Address is 3665 Tamarack off of Ski Run Blvd.  (we share space with Image Angels Photography Services)  This class is held on a Love Offering basis.

3.  There is still time to join the Living Deeply class, which began last week.  Held at the Center at 6:30 pm, this ten week class costs $100.  This is a great introductory class which is based on the book called Living Deeply, published by the Institute of Noetic Sciences.

Questions?  Call 530-906-9336

I hope to see you at one or all of our exciting events!

I’ll be real honest  here:  I don’t much care for church.

At least, not in the traditional sense of the word.  You know, when you go once a week, listen to someone tell you what to believe, believe him, and then go about your normal business the rest of the week, blindly following the lead of the person who was standing at the podium last Sunday, somehow thinking that if you are a good boy or girl, all will be well.

Nope, not for me.

So, off I went on life’s journey, thinking church and all that God stuff wasn’t on my list of things to do.  I had some…..um….interesting adventures and survived them.  There were times when I was conscious enough to have an inkling of a thought that there must be more to life than this.  On I continued with my interesting adventures, still surviving, until one day I realized I simply could not exist anymore the way I had been existing.  I’ll spare you the details, but suffice to say it was not pretty and I was not doing well.

I also knew that while church was not an option for me, spirituality was.  So I began seeking.  And found my way back home to the Centers for Spiritual Living.  I say back home because I come from a family line of New Thought folks.  When I was a kid, my dad became a Practitioner in CSL.  I grew up with him saying things like “thought is powerful” and “God is everywhere” and “it doesn’t necessarily have to be called God” and “change your thinking, change your life.”

I needed a change in my thinking, so I began taking classes.  Centers for Spiritual Living are all about teaching.  We teach spiritual tools so that you can live a better life.  My first class was, I think, Practical Mysticism.   What I got out of that class was that I knew I wanted to become a Practitioner.  Four years of classes later and I was installed as a Practitioner at CSL Carson City.

So I settled into a relatively new life as a Spiritual Coach, helping people, and living a very peaceful life because I had found what was missing before.  I no longer existed, I was living life to its fullest!

Then along came Ministerial School.  Now remember, this is the girl who doesn’t like church.  But Ministerial School called.  The calling didn’t make sense.  I was cruising along, happy in my day job as owner of a photography studio and happy in my part time job as Spiritual Coach.  Yet…..there was something.  Some nebulous and indescribable little nudge that would not go away.  Things fell into place with very little effort on my part, and I was matriculated into the Masters Degree Program at Holmes Institute.

That was two years ago, and with a graduation date in two  more years (June of 2014), I still don’t like church much, at least not as I described it in the beginning of this post.

But, I LOVE going to Centers for Spiritual Living!   I love going on Sundays to hear the talks given by our wonderful and talented and well trained speakers.  And I especially love that within each and every message is another message:  it says to find out for yourself whether what I am saying is true, take a class, incorporate spiritual practices into your every day life.  It says that spirituality is not just about attending a Sunday celebration service.

Every time I go on a Sunday to a CSL (it doesn’t matter where it is) I leave empowered, refreshed and excited.

So now I am trained, and now we have our very own CSL in South Lake Tahoe.  Myself and small group of people have a vision:  that there will be a CSL presence in South Lake Tahoe where people can go to learn spiritual tools to live happier lives.  We are totally and completely committed to that vision and so, we are offering some events for you, three to be exact.

1.  Third Tuesdays.  Beginning October 16, at 6 pm, at the Blue Angel Loft at 1132 Ski Run Blvd in South Lake Tahoe, I will be presenting the first of a series of monthly talks.  Yes, it’s a bit like church.  You go, and you hear some inspirational words and listen to some cool music.  But that’s only the beginning.  I will be giving a talk once a month, every Third Tuesday, at the Blue Angel Loft, at 6 pm, for the foreseeable future.  Here’s the deal:  if you do nothing but come once a month to hear me talk (by the way, I’m an excellent speaker) you will benefit.  But wait….there’s more!

2.  First, second, fourth and fifth Tuesdays: in other words, all the other Tuesdays of the month, I will be teaching a beginner’s class designed to allow you to explore what this thing called Center for Spiritual Living is all about.  It’s love offering based, and it will be held all the other Tuesdays of the month, at the Center for Spiritual Living Lake Tahoe at 3665 Tamarack, in South Lake Tahoe.  We are currently sharing space with my photography studio, Image Angels.  It’s a nice space, with beautiful art work on the walls. You’ll like it.  It all begins at 6 pm.

3.  Living Deeply.  CSLLT is, after all, a Teaching Chapter, so we are gonna be teaching, a lot!  Brenda Heldoorn is teaching this class.  It’s based on the book called Living Deeply, published by the Institute of Noetic Sciences.  This is a great book and I plan to attend the class because Brenda is a great teacher!  She’s also a Practitioner by the way.  This class is a ten week class and cost is $100, or $10 per class, plus you will have to purchase the book.  We will have some on sale at the first class but if you order your book from Amazon right now, you’ll have it in time for class.  This class starts at 6:30 pm, the first class will be Thursday, October 18,  and will also be held at CSLLT at3665 Tamarack.

So, to recap, come hear me speak the Third Tuesday of every month at 6 pm at the Blue Angel Loft.  My first talk title, by the way, is “Take it Through the Roof.”  Then on Tuesdays and Thursdays at CSLLT, come to class!

Here is my promise to you:  if you come, and apply some of the principles you learn to your life, your life will change.  I guarantee it.

“You, like all others, are seeking the joy of living.”  Ernest Holmes, This Thing Called You

I’ve begun rereading this wonderful little book in preparation for a series of introductory classes I will be doing beginning with Third  Tuesday on October 16.  The quote is the first sentence in this gem of spiritual delight, which is quite frequently used as a tool to introduce people to New Thought and Science of Mind.

I was introduced to Science of Mind when I was a child, as my father became a Practitioner then.  I grew up with him saying things like:  “thought has power,”  and “God is within you.”  I went away from the teaching for a little while, as I think all young adults are wont to do, and explored life and myself.  I went to college, began a career, and experienced some more and quite major trauma and drama along the way, which eventually drove me back to the teachings I had learned as a child.  I knew this was where the answer lay.  I knew that by exploring this teaching I would be able to successfully move through depression, anger, feelings of abandonment and a general malaise that manifested as simply not fitting in.  I began to once again explore Science of Mind 17 years ago.

Little did I know that return to Science of Mind 17 years ago would place me where I am now.  Life was full and rewarding before (well, before the latest trauma du jour), but guess what?  Enlarging my spiritual life through the teachings of  Science of Mind has allowed my life to be even more full, even more rewarding.  I never dreamed, never even approached dreaming, of the life I have now, or the things I am able to be, do and accomplish.  It is all so wonderful and rich!

So, here I am, a ministerial student at Holmes Institute (yes, named after Ernest Holmes, the guy who wrote the quote that began this blog, and a whole bunch of other stuff).  Here I am a Spiritual Leader of Center for Spiritual Living Lake Tahoe, which I founded, and here I am, offering to you the same teachings that have so enriched and changed my life.

So!  Our inaugural event is called Third Tuesdays, and we will begin with the third Tuesday in October.  Time is 6 pm, place is the Blue Angel Loft, on Ski Run Blvd in South Lake Tahoe.  It’s above the Blue Angel Cafe.  Each Third Tuesday of the month will feature a talk, accompanied by some cool music, some munchable goodies and great fellowship.  Every other Tuesday I will offer a free series of exploratory classes to introduce you to this wonderful teaching called Science of Mind.  Those will be held at CSL Lake Tahoe, at 3665 Tamarack Avenue, off of Ski Run Blvd, right around the corner from the Blue Angel Loft.  They will also be held at 6 pm.

In the meantime, here’s some more information for you:  The CSLLT web site is www.csllt.org.  There you will find more information about this wonderful organization called Centers for Spiritual Living.  The main web site for CSL is https://csl.org/.  Address for Third Tuesdays is 1132 Ski Run Boulevard  South Lake Tahoe, CA 96150.  We will be meeting in the Loft, above the Cafe, at 6 pm beginning with the Third Tuesday of October, the 16th.  Every other Tuesday we will meet at CSLLT, the address is 3665 Tamarack Avenue, South Lake Tahoe, CA 96150. It’s off of Ski Run Blvd, and we share space with Image Angels Photography Services, look for the big sign.  Those Introductory Tuesdays will also begin at 6 pm.  Third Tuesdays and Introductory classes are all offered on a Love offering basis.

And last but not least, if you have any questions, you can call CSLLT at 530-906-9336!

Today is Mother’s Day and even though my mother moved on to the next plane of existence fourteen years ago, I still think of her and the lessons I learned from her when days like Mother’s day roll around.

My mom was a, shall we say….ahem….colorful character.  She liked fast cars and faster men, in an age when such a thing was REALLY frowned upon.  She also liked the lifestyle that went with fast cars and fast men.  Some say I had an abnormal childhood because of who and what she was, but I never compared my childhood with others, so I didn’t see it as abnormal. I never doubted my mother’s love for me, even if it was expressed in unconditional ways.  Our relationship was rocky, and there were years when I did not speak to her and years when I lost my respect for her.  She was never really a traditional mother figure for me, but she was, still, my mother.  At the end, I had done my work and loved her and honored her place as mother in my life.  At the end, forgiveness was complete for me.  I continue to be grateful for what my mother taught me, so here is some motherly wisdom for you.

1.  Always tip the cab driver, because you never know when he’s going to sit at your table.  Back then this had a practical aspect:  she was a waitress and I ended up being a waitress for many years while putting myself through college.  Today I know this wisdom is another  way of voicing a basic spiritual truth:  we receive what we put out, do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

2.  Don’t let anyone tell you you can’t do something because you’re a girl.  My mother was a feminist from the get go, she didn’t believe in women not being able to do anything they wanted because they were women.  She illustrated this by becoming a very good amateur race car driver, she raced Porsches.  She taught me to drive, and owning a Porsche Targa convertible is on my bucket list, that’s a legacy from my mom (my dad prefers British cars…just sayin’).  Today I see what she voiced back then as another version of the concepts of non-duality and non-separation.  Just as Spirit is not separate from us, neither are we separate from other humans by virtue of our gender, race or any other perceived difference.  To this day I really don’t much care for all women retreats, or for anything that excludes because of gender or race.

3.  Forgiveness gives the person doing the forgiving the relief, not the forgiven.  My mom wasn’t the only one who taught me this, but she was the one who taught me it was important to forgive before they move on to the next plane of existence.  Forgiving to someone you can’t consciously communicate with is, at least for me, unsatisfactory.  Somehow, when she was getting ready to move on, I knew this, even though I hadn’t yet even begun my Practitioner training, and made sure that nothing was left unsaid before she went.  I also made sure that I did everything humanly possible to be there for her and be a good daughter to her in those last months.  This entailed many trips to Fallbrook, CA, where she was living at the time.  I would work my weekends as a wedding photographer,  then go to see her for a day or three during the week, then fly back home to Tahoe and do it all over again.  During my times with her I would sleep on the floor in her bedroom (no room for a cot, and it was too painful for her to share the bed) because she didn’t want to be alone, and I would spend the days with her watching TV together, or talking, or reminiscing.   I am so grateful for that experience!

4.  Downshift and slow down coming into a curve, then speed up coming out of it, and hug the corners.  This is standard race car driver speak, and she taught me well.  I’m sure my  mother never meant any of the stuff she taught me to be metaphors for life, but that’s what I’ve done with these lessons.  The metaphor here?  We all experience curves in life, those times when the path we are on becomes a bit tougher to negotiate.  This is the time to slow down a bit and be gentle with ourselves.  The slower gentler pace will make it easier to negotiate the curve, and when we begin to come out of the curve we can speed up a bit if we like.  And just as there will always be curves, the curves will also always straighten up.

5.  My mom also taught me some lessons that I’ve had to unlearn.  The biggest one was “don’t rely on anyone for anything.”   I don’t know why she felt she couldn’t rely on anyone, but I do know that the people in our lives are mirrors for ourselves.   All that color and character did make her a bit unreliable in certain situations, so it is no surprise that she attracted unreliable people into her life.  My journey has first been to make myself reliable, and then to know that others are reliable too.  And in order to rely on others, I’ve had to have a certain amount of trust.  Guess what?  I had to trust myself first before I could trust others.  I still have to consciously remind myself that I can ask for help, and it is always rewarding when I do.

I am so grateful for the lessons my mom taught me. I would not be the person I am today if it weren’t for her influence, and I like that person.  Today is a day when many are celebrating their moms.  If you’re mom is alive, spend some time with her and tell her how grateful you are for her influence in your life.  And if you can’t do that, just wish her a Happy Mother’s Day and make it a goal to be able,  by next Mother’s Day, to be grateful for her and to express that gratitude to her.  You will be glad you did.

Here is the calendar image for May!  The quote is from Dr. Seuss and says, “I like nonsense; it wakes up the brain cells.”

I sometimes hear a lot of talk about triggers.

“I’m triggered by this.”  “That is a trigger of mine.”  “That’s a trigger and will make me (insert your favorite destructive activity here).”

Really?  Hmmm.  On the one hand, I empathize with folks whose lives are ruled by triggers.   I know what it’s like to live life reacting to what is handed out to me.  It’s not a pleasant place to be, and it’s even less unpleasant because when I was there, I didn’t know what I didn’t know.  I was ignorant, going through life being triggered and not knowing there was any other way to be, not knowing there was any other way to do things.

I also know that it is extremely difficult to rid ourselves of those things which just…well….they push  our buttons and before we know it, we are reacting willy nilly to something without any hesitation at all!

What’s up with that?!?!?!

I’ve rid myself of many of my triggers, and I’ve removed the language of “that’s a trigger for me” from my vocabulary.  Our words have power, and if I say something is a trigger, well, it remains a trigger and I’d really like to avoid being the victim of things like triggers.

So other than removing the language from your vocabulary, what else can you do to remove a trigger?

I’m assuming, of course, that you would really like to have the trigger removed.  So that’s really the first step.  What would your life be like if you were no longer triggered by….let’s say, crowds.  Would it then be possible to go to crowded places?  Perhaps there is a concert you would  like to attend.  What would life be like if you no longer had that limitation? Would it feel empty inside without that trigger to determine where you go and when you go there?  Would it feel a bit scary to be able to simply make a decision to go or not to go based on your desire?  Do some introspection on it, think about whether you really want to remove the trigger, and what life would be like without it.

In treatment centers they like to talk about triggers a lot to their clients, telling them to stay away from bars and other places where alcohol is consumed.  I can understand that when one is still not quite in one’s right mind.  When one does not know one’s own truth, one is subjected to the truth of others, and yes, that will allow triggers to continue to operate in your life.  But the foremost authority on recovery from alcoholism says that one can even attend “plain ordinary whoopee parties” if one is spiritually fit.  (the textbook of Alcoholics Anonymous, page 101)

And that right there is the key.  Being spiritually fit will allow you to be anything and accomplish everything that is on your  list of things to do, no matter what.  Triggers will no longer be in your vocabulary if you are spiritually fit.

So what does it mean to be spiritually fit?  First of all, I know that word spiritual can be word loaded with different meanings, so for this discussion I’m going to offer a definition of spiritual:  being spiritual means you are at peace. Period.  End of story.    What allows you to be at peace?   What allows you to live a life based on love, rather than fear?    That is spiritual.

Here’s a formula, if you will, for ridding yourself of a trigger.  Just as an aside, this is also the formula for living a loved based life, rather than a fear based one, because really, it all boils down to that:  a fear based life is ruled by things like triggers, and a love based life is ruled by love.

1. First is the aforementioned introspection to decide if you really wish to be rid of the trigger.  Because if you don’t, none of the steps  will be effective.

2.  Finding a god in your life is of utmost importance.  God is another one of those loaded words, but really, it doesn’t matter what it is, and it doesn’t matter what  you call it.   And if you look, you will find clues as to what and where your god is.  God is about experience, not rules, not dogma,  not the latest fad.  Don’t become a spiritual athlete by jumping from one fad to another in search of that magic formula that will make everything ok.  That’s an outside fix, and outside fixes are never effective for very long.  What needs to happen is inner change, an inner experience.   Being spiritual is about experience.  The experience of being spiritual will change  you, from the inside.  It will allow you to perceive things differently, to feel differently about yourself and the world around you.  Being spiritual will allow you to behave differently.  And it doesn’t really matter how you get spiritual, or find a god of your understanding, just that you find it.  If going to church does it for you, then good, do that.  But I think there is more to it.  At Centers for Spiritual Living all over the world, Sunday services are a very small part of what we do, because we consider ourselves a teaching order rather than a religious one.  We teach.  At any given Center, Teaching Chapter or Study Group, you will find classes, workshops and seminars galore.  And the common theme throughout much of what we teach is this:  do spiritual practices, consistently and persistently.  Spiritual practices consist of meditation, journaling, reading spiritual literature (there’s that word again!  I am not talking the bible here folks, although that could be on the list), introspection.  And we teach you how to do those  things.  We teach you how to do those things because it is in those practices that you will find a god of your understanding, it is in those practices that you will experience the spiritual and it is in those practices that you will be able to know  your own truth, not someone else’s.   You can find a Center here.

3.  Once you have a beginning sense of the spiritual  in your  life, it’s time for some more introspection.  Your sense of who and what  you are will change as you incorporate a sense of the spiritual into your life.  It’s a process that can happen very quickly or more slowly, but it will happen if you continue to do spiritual practices, consistently and persistently.  At this level introspection,  take a good hard look at the things you fear in life.  Fear is key, because, as the Course in Miracles says, there are only two states of being:   fear and love, and you can’t have love if you are in fear, and you can’t have fear if you are in love.  I’d like to see  you be in love, all the time.  So when you look at your fears, and how you react to them, and what makes  you feel fear, you will have gone a long way towards being rid of them.  Hold your fears up to the light of day and they have a tendency to scurry away, like cockroaches when you turn on the light.  You are only as sick as  your secrets.  Look at what  you fear, and how you react to it.  If you don’t understand what fear looks like, look at what makes you angry.  Anger is a result of fear.  So is judgment.  So is blame, shame, guilt, hatred.  Anytime you are feeling any of those things, you are in fear.

4.  Once you’ve taken some time to do the  inner  work, talk with someone about it.  Just as an aside, it  might be very difficult to do the inner work on your own as we are not as a rule taught to do that.  If that is the case, seek help from the beginning of the process, not at this stage.   There are Practitioners all over the world  who are  specifically trained for this kind of work, and it doesn’t have to be someone local.   I work with people on the phone all the time, and I quite frequently will call on the assistance of a Practitioner from another area.  You can find a Practitioner here.

5.  Once you’ve  done that, it’s time to set things right in your life.  You might find that after all that inner work, there are some outside things in  your life that  no longer fit.  You may find that after all that inner work there are some people with whom you need to have a heart to heart talk.  You may experience a period of deconstruction in your life as a result of a changed you.  While this is uncomfortable, it isn’t life threatening, and is necessary in order to live life differently.

6.  Continue your spiritual practices, consistently and persistently.  No matter what.  Just do them.  With spiritual practices as your foundation in life, you will only become more and more powerful, and less and less susceptible to triggers.

Are you Enchanted with Life?

I learned something cool in one of my classes the other day.  The professor was explaining that when French people are introduced, instead of saying, “pleased to meet you,” they say, “enchanté,” which is short for “I am enchanted.”

What I got out of the professor’s explanation of enchantment was that being enchanted with life is what spirituality is all about.

Spirituality is not about going to church.  Nor is it about believing in a certain way because you were told to believe that way.   Instead, consider that spirituality could be about being enchanted, no matter what.

In the dictionary, one of the definitions of enchanted is, “to delight to a high degree.  As in her gaiety and wit have enchanted us all.”

So how do you do that?  How does one remain enchanted, or delighted with life, no matter what?

Let’s face it: life happens.  Leading a spiritually based life does not mean that stuff we judge as bad or less than desirable is not going to  happen.  Doing spiritual practices everyday like meditation, contemplation or journaling does not guarantee that we are going to be immune from the ups and downs of life.  It just means we will be better able to handle them, and to respond instead of react.

But what if we took it a step further?  What if we made a decision to be enchanted, no matter what?  What if, instead of taking a walk and noticing how beautiful the fall colors were, we moved in a bit closer, to notice the minute changes in color of just a couple of leaves.

What if we used those minute changes in color as a metaphor for our lives?  What if we made a minute change in a behavior, or in a way of thinking?  Do you not think that such a minute change might result in the entire forest changing?

I think this is the way we can become enchanted with life, by making minute changes in our behavior and perception.  Just a little bit at a time, we can change our entire being, our entire lives.  And if you believe that you can be the change you wish to see in the world, think of how making a minute change in your life can contribute to changing the world.

So be enchanted today.  Change one tiny little thing, and decide to be enchanted about it.  And let me know what happens with that!

I’ll just come right out and say it:  I don’t believe in prayer.  But I do believe in knowing, in faith and in the power of spiritual practices like treatment, meditation and the power that is manifested when a group of people gets together and all place their attention on one thing, the highest and best good for all concerned.

And just in case you are wondering about my opening statement, I define prayer as a beseeching to an outside, separate entity, and that is simply not in my belief system.

I also know that there is a temptation to do, instead of to be, especially if impending doom is sensed or real.  Fear makes us do, and it very often makes us do things that we would not normally do.   I am so grateful for a teaching that taught me, and then continues to remind me, that it is more important to be first, then any necessary doing will follow.  Especially in the face of some perceived impending doom.

It does not matter what the impending doom is, what matters is that we do not do destructive things behind the fear created by the impending doom.

So my story is that I’ve been in the hallway for a while.  Big deal things have been uncertain, and that could be a scary place to be.  I didn’t talk much about it, only told a few very close friends, who, with great well meaning, immediately suggested some things for me to do to get myself out of the situation I found myself in.  But spiritually, I knew it was more important to be rather than to do.  Spiritually, I knew that I needed to go deeper, to spend more time in meditation and introspection, and affirm the truth of who and what I am.

And when my mind starting nagging me to do something and the second guessing started, I knew that what was important was to do more spiritual stuff and use the tools I have been given, and utilize the support of my Master Mind group and Practitioners.  I’m not saying I didn’t do stuff.  I did not simply drop everything and go sit on a mountain top somewhere to meditate until I was told which door to open in the hallway.   I have continued to enjoy life, have fun, do the dishes, go to work, walk the dog, all the stuff that we do, and while I was doing all that, I maintained a consciousness of knowing and never reacted to the situation in front of me.  I never really lost faith, although sometimes, when the second guessing was loudest, I was sorely tempted to react.  Fortunately I have been able to resist that temptation, because reaction behind fear never works out well.

So now it looks as if I might be traveling out of the hallway,  and I am grateful.  I’m grateful for the power of thought and treatment.  I am grateful for the power of knowing and being.  I am grateful for the people in my life who continue to support me spiritually.  And my mind is second guessing me, again.  “Ok, now that we got out of THAT one we need to go DO stuff so it doesn’t happen again!”  GEEZ.

I don’t think it is just me that does this stuff.  I think everyone does it to a certain extent.  Which is why I’m again grateful for the teachings of New Thought, that tell me and continue to remind me that it is more important to know rather than to question, more important to be rather than do.

If you are in a hallway of sorts, a place of uncertainty and questions, resist the temptation to react and do.  Instead, move within and know that spiritual awesome truth of you.  Do the inner work, and the outside will manifest just as it should.

I came across a very cool post this morning and thought I would share it with you, along with my own personal commentary about how to deal with such regrets before it is too late and you’ve moved onto another plane of existence.  You can find the original post here:  http://ohdarling.posterous.com/nurse-reveals-the-top-5-regrets-people-make-o .  It was written by a nurse whose specialty was dealing with the dying.  Hospice care is not my specialty, although I am trained to help people make their transitions peacefully and easily.    If you can deal with these top five things before it’s time to make your transition, I think you might find life much more enjoyable.

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. How, exactly, can you be true to yourself?  Without sacrificing relationships and while honoring others while they are true to themselves?  First of all, we must know ourselves in order to be true to ourselves.  Sometimes, the prospect of getting to know ourselves can be an unwelcome one.  But with the right kind of support and a spiritual connection, it becomes easier to be true to yourself, and to honor the path of others.  And sometimes, in being true to yourself, a relationship does get sacrificed.  If you are really being true to yourself and the relationship goes away because of it, then it was meant to be.  If you can’t be true to yourself in a relationship, the relationship and both parties become toxic, and that is not a good thing.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard. I believe that there is a balance in all things, and that working too much or too hard (there is a difference!) simply means we are out of balance.  Why are you working so much?  Is it because you love your work?  Or is it because you have a fear of financial insecurity?  Or perhaps because you are escaping some other less pleasant aspect of your life?  In order to not work so hard or so much, you must be willing to let go of the payoff that you receive from that practice, whether it’s more money or escape or something else.  It may take some revision in your life in order to do this, and again, support or work with a coach can help with this.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings. The nurse who wrote the original post really said it very well, so I’m just going to copy her words here:

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly,in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.”

I will add, as a caveat, that expressing your feelings can be done gently and compassionately, or hurtfully.  Some work in the area of compassionate or non-violent communication can help with this.  And know that how you communicate with yourself is how you communicate with others.  If you are your own worse critic, you may want to get some help using a technique like inner dialogue or guided imagery to help you be gentler with yourself.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. Take some time to spend with your friends…on a regular basis.  Friendships don’t just happen, they need time and energy, much like marriages.  I remember people used to say that all good marriages need work to survive.  I always disagreed with that, but until recently didn’t know why.   Now I know that it is my concept of work that I disagree with.  I do think marriages take energy and time.  Couples need to spend time together, they  need to have date nights, they need to pay attention to one another, they need to each honor the other’s path.  I call that energy and time, not work, and I think friendships need the same in order to survive.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier. This statement illustrates quite nicely what happens when we approach our transition:  physical stuff takes a back seat, and the more important stuff comes forward in an age old wisdom.  The wisdom is that happiness is a choice.  Abe Lincoln said that we are only as happy as we make up our minds to be, and he was right.  So today, make the choice to be happy.  Then do it again tomorrow.